When Copying One Sentence Feels Like Climbing a Mountain
This must be day one hundred — or perhaps even more — since my son started Primary Two. Honestly, I’ve already lost count.
Like every afternoon, I parked my car and walked under the hot sun towards his school. These days, before I even see him, one thought immediately races through my mind: Did he copy his homework today?
When I reached the waiting area, I found him sitting quietly by himself, daydreaming and watching his friends. It is a very different picture from six or seven months ago. Back then, he would be running around the basketball court with his arms stretched out like an aeroplane, flying away into some imaginary world. Sometimes I look at him now and wonder whether his hyperactivity has truly reduced over the past year. Perhaps the combination of nutritional support, supplements, sensory regulation, and the various interventions we started have helped more than I realise. Much of that journey was documented in my first book, My Child Is Not Naughty — Just Different: Raising an ADHD Child Through Eastern Wisdom and Modern Science. I am now slowly recording the next stage of his journey as well.
The first thing I usually ask him is, “Did you copy your homework?” Sometimes he greets me with a smile and proudly tells me how many pieces of homework he has. But when his head lowers and his voice becomes soft, I already know the answer. Many afternoons, I end up sending him back to the classroom to copy the homework into his little notebook. My greatest worry is usually Bahasa Malaysia. The teacher writes everything on the whiteboard, but very often my son simply does not copy it at all.
For months, I wondered why.
After observing him closely over time, I slowly realised that his ADHD was only part of the story. His dyslexia had become an equally important reason behind his reluctance to copy.
The Front Seat Didn’t Solve the Problem
At the beginning of Primary Two, his class teacher placed him at the back of the classroom. Complaints soon followed. He doesn’t listen. He doesn’t copy. He doesn’t complete his work. His handwriting is messy.
Eventually, we brought out his formal diagnosis showing that he has ADHD, dyslexia, and dysgraphia. To be honest, I have always viewed the diagnosis mainly as protection — proof that my son is not simply lazy or defiant. Unfortunately, an official diagnosis does not automatically teach a school system how to help a child learn.
We have accepted that Chinese schools are largely performance-driven and discipline-oriented. Some parents have questioned why we continue to keep him there. I actually discussed the reasons behind that decision in my earlier book, and perhaps I will revisit that topic again in another reflection.
The teacher eventually moved him to the front row beside a model student. But nothing really changed. Not because he could not see the board. The problem was never eyesight.
1. Dyslexic Children Often Struggle to Stabilise Words
One thing I slowly realised over the past year is that copying homework may actually be one of the most difficult tasks for a child like mine.
For teachers managing thirty or forty students, the process is simple. Teach the lesson, write the homework on the board, and students copy it down. For most neurotypical children, the sequence happens almost automatically. They look, copy, and continue, much like lifting rice with a spoon.
But for a child with ADHD, dyslexia, and dysgraphia, the process is far more complicated. Before my son can even begin writing, he first has to stabilise the words he sees. Because of dyslexia, letters sometimes become visual noise and do not remain still long enough for him to process comfortably. Then he must transfer the information into working memory, hold it there long enough to write, and coordinate the physical act of writing despite his dysgraphia. By the time the pencil touches the paper, much of his energy has already been spent.
What appears to others as a simple act of copying can sometimes feel, to him, like running an obstacle course before the lesson has even begun.
2. Copying Homework Is Not One Task
As I observed him more closely, I realised something else.
Copying homework is not actually one task. It is many tasks happening simultaneously. He has to locate the correct line, maintain attention, remember the information, keep track of where he stopped, regulate his body, control his handwriting, resist distractions, and then continue writing.
For many children, these processes happen unconsciously. For my son, every step demands effort. By the time he reaches the final step, he is often already mentally exhausted.
3. Reading Itself Already Consumes Enormous Energy
Perhaps the biggest discovery I made over the past year is this: reading itself is my son’s greatest energy expenditure.
People often assume that because he struggles to complete work, he must not understand. Yet repeatedly, I discovered the opposite. He understands stories. He understands Science concepts. He can answer questions orally.
What drains him is the process of getting information from the page into his brain.
Many children simply read and write. My son often has to decode, confirm, recall, and only then produce an answer. Every word costs energy.
4. Working Memory Is Fragile
Another thing I noticed is that he cannot hold large amounts of information in his mind at once.
A classmate may glance at the board and remember an entire sentence. My son may only remember one or two words before the rest disappears. Then he has to look up again. And again. And again.
What appears to others as slowness may simply be the limit of how much information his brain can temporarily hold.
5. Attention Drifts Constantly
Even when he wants to do the work, his attention often leaves him before he leaves the task.
I see this repeatedly during revision sessions and examinations. His eyes drift away. His mind wanders. Sometimes only for a few seconds. Sometimes longer. Often, he does not even realise it himself.
Over time, I stopped saying, “Concentrate.”
Instead, I simply remind him, “Eyes back to the paper.”
Not because he is refusing to focus, but because sometimes he genuinely does not realise where his attention has gone.
6. Writing Is Work Too
People often assume that once a child understands, writing should naturally follow. But writing itself is another task altogether.
Spacing. Letter formation. Motor planning. Producing the answer physically.
Even when the answer is already inside his head, getting it onto paper can still feel exhausting. Sometimes I think people only see the final product and forget how much invisible work happens before the pencil even touches the page.
This, however, was only the first half of the story.
Because after months of frustration, I eventually discovered something else.
My son wasn’t refusing to copy homework for only neurological reasons.
There was another reason — one I never expected.
And perhaps that reason mattered even more than ADHD, dyslexia, or dysgraphia.
That reflection belongs in My Son Won’t Copy His Homework- Beyond the Lens of ADHD
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